Sunday, July 26, 2009

Wedding Bells....

My mom and my stepfather got hitched Friday for the second They just went to the courthouse but it was actually nice, the judge performed the ceremony outside, I didn't know they did that. My mom and dad wanted to keep it small and intimate but there were several family members who came to show their support. I'm really happy for the newlyweds.

After the ceremony there was a big party at my parents house. We had a wonderful time, we danced and laughed the night away. There was plenty of food, drinks, lawn games, music, family and friends....just what we needed.

My aunt (mom's sister) made my parents a DVD slide show of pictures from all the years together. We had some good laughs, some of them were old, my dad had much more hair and it was dark. I can't believe how long they have been together....they truly are soul mates. After all how many people do you know that get a divorce, then a few years later get married again...:) I want to share with you a song that my aunt had playing to the slide show, this is a song my dad use to sing to my mom all the time...check it out, it's old so there is not a video but you can still hear it. I was young when he use to sing this to my mom but I never forgot it, when he heard it start to play he became very emotional. It was great to let him know what an impact that made on me, I love this song b/c it means so much to my him and her. One of my mothers favorite songs is this one, by Chris Brown (I know he is a bad guy but...she love it). Overall it was a very emotional day, such an awesome celebration. I wish my little brother could have been there but we all know he was in spirit. Pictures are yet to come...

Friday, July 17, 2009

We hired a cleaning crew...

Infertility and the treatment that goes along with it has over the years taken a toll on me. I felt as though I was chasing a dream that would never be my reality. There were plenty of days I felt like giving up. I admit, I have and always will carry a feeling of guilt for not being able to carry a child. My husband has never uttered one word to make me feel this way, I just do.
Now that we have adopted, I feel like our dreams have in fact come true. I vividly remember telling my husband that we could love a child...any child we adopted. I just can't believe how much we love him, it's scary. I shower him with so many hugs and kisses I wonder if it's going to effect him in some weird way in the Can you over love a child? Really though my life has never been so rich and fulfilled, he is our miracle child.

About three years ago I started working out of my home. I work two days a week and every other Saturday, which is complaints here. I'm very fortunate to be able to spend three full weekdays with our son. I love hanging out with him but housework still needs to be done. When my two nieces were living here it was a bit more difficult to keep up because we had so much more laundry, baths, bedtime stories, combing of the hair, making lunch, dinner, reading about all the school happenings....oh, the list goes on. But now that it's just the three of us, things are more doable for me. At times I get panicked when I think about adopting #2, I wonder how well things will go and if I'll be able to keep up with additional responsibilities.

That leads me to the talk I had with A a few weeks back, I told him I need HELP. A works full time and there are also days he works side jobs. I don't mind him working long hours because adopting and raising a child/children is not cheap but that means I'm home with G by myself more often. It can be hard, there are days G is just not happy and I get stressed. He loves his momma and wants all her attention, it's difficult to run the vacuum or do the dishes, he clings to my leg and cries. Of course, I want to get on the floor and play cars with him, read books to him or just chase him around, which he thinks is the best. I know that this time with G is important, I'm not going to ignore him just to get everything done. It's a time all experienced mothers tell me to enjoy because it goes way to fast, I already find it hard to believe G is 17 months old. I have to remind myself to relax daily because I get so caught up in what has to be done or what we should be doing....argh, my mind just doesn't stop.

So we hired a cleaning service...YAY! They came by for the first time on the 15th, Marissa and Erica are the two girls that will help me keep this house in order. I thought for a minute I would need Niecy from Clean Sweep. I don't by any means have a big house but it's not all that small either, they were here for 4 hours. It's been three days and my house is still looking great. I'm a clean person but once G came along that took a backseat. All of last year I had to constantly remind myself to relax and that everything will just be fine, even if my house was messy. I am really looking forward to the additional help, I'm hoping it will give me time to get bigger tasks redecorating the dinning room. It's been at a stand still for about 3 years.

BTW, I meant to finish this post Saturday the 18th, it's now the 23rd and just now getting posted.


Thursday, July 9, 2009

We could get a call at anytime.....

Yesterday, we had a meeting with Carrie. Carrie is a SW at Bethany. She came out to our house to do a home visit and update our paperwork for our foster parent license. I never imagined we would be licensed foster parents, it's strange how things happen. She walked around our house, pressed all three of our fire alarms (one needs batteries), she also checked where we keep our medications and she took a look at our 'vacant' (how it's stated on the application) bedroom. My house was a little messy (that's another b/c I spent a good part of the day in the pool so I was a little embarrassed but who least I had enough sense to jump out of my bathing suit and put some clothes on 15 minutes before she arrived. I guess the important part is she gave us the thumbs up.

I have to say that during the meeting I did get a little upset. A and I were describing the ideal situation for US. We know that there are a lot of older children up for adoption through the state but we are not ready for an older child at this time. For one I nearly had to twist A's arm to even pursue adoption through foster care. And secondly G is still so little, I have to protect him and make his childhood enjoyable. At this time G is my priority. Having said this, our SW looked at us and basically said that if we are not open to more situations her supervisor will ask why we are even licensed. I can't believe she said this...I had to bite my tongue, when I really wanted to tell her to just let our license expire. If helping/adopting one child out of the foster care system isn't enough, than forget it. We've come to the realization that we are not cut out to be full time foster parents, with children of all ages coming and going. Eventually we agreed to foster up to 2 children under the age of 3. She did note that we would like a newborn, so we'll see what happens.

I have to admit after our meeting I kind of feel like maybe the infant adoption program at Bethany is the way to go. But I know of several families who have adopted through their state foster care system and are very happy.

If any of you ever have any questions, please ask, I'll try to answer them to the best of my ability.

I've been

It's been awhile....things have been hectic for sure! Just to let you all know we had a wonderful 4th of July. A, G and I went to A's brother's house down in Normal, IL. It was really nice to get away and very relaxing. We were very spoiled by T (my future sister-inlaw). I seriously did not want to come home. One morning she cooked us all omelets....omg, so good. They live in a busy subdivision so I thought there was no way we would be able to light good fireworks...boy, was I wrong. T had a big box full of illegal fireworks, in their subdivision there are empty lots still for sale. So we drove/walked down the street where pyromaniac T put on a great show. It was awesome, we had such a great time....funny thing is T said next year she is upping her firework budget. I think she is going to be a great sister

We have been seriously enjoying this summer, we are keeping ourselves very busy with family and friends. I just want to let you all know that I'm very thankful for my life. I never thought I would ever feel so complete, I'm happy beyond my imagination. I'm so thankful and love giving praise to the Lord above, without him none of this would be possible. Thank you, thank you, thank you!